The End...

..of 2008.

Last one for this year :)

Redemption Song by Lauryn Hill and Ziggy Marley
"Emancipate yourself from mental slavery;
none but ourselves can free our minds."

Turn Your Lights Down Low by Lauryn Hill and Ziggy Marley
"Loving you is a like a song I replay
Every three minutes and thirty seconds of every day
And every chorus was written for us to recite
Every beautiful melody of devotion every night
It's potion like this ocean that might carry me
In a wave of emotion to ask you to marry me
And every word, every second, and every third
Expresses the happiness more clearly than ever heard
And when I play them, every chord is a poem
Telling the Lord how grateful I am cause I know him
The harmonies possess a sensation similar to your caress
If you asking then I'm telling you it's yes
Stand in love, take my hand in love, God bless"

Somewhere Only We Know by Keane
"And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?"

Your Every Color by Train
"I love your every color,
I love your everything."

Inevitable by Anberlin
"I wanna be your last, first kiss
That you'll ever have."

Better Together by Jack Johnson
"It's always better when we're together."

Crash Into Me by Dave Matthews Band
"I watch you there
Through the window
And I stare at you
You wear nothing but you
Wear it so well
Tied up and twisted
The way I'd like to be
For you, for me, come crash
Into me."

Light Up the Sky by Yellowcard
"Let me light up the sky, light it up for you.
Let me tell you why I would die for you."

The Scientist by Coldplay
"Nobody said it was easy,
It's such a shame for us to part.
Nobody said it was easy,
No one ever said it would be this hard."

Drops of Jupiter by Train
"Tell me, did you sail across the sun,
Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded,
And that heaven is overrated
Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there?"

My Wish by Rascal Flatts
"My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish."

Hot n Cold by Katy Perry
"Someone, call a doctor,
got a case of love bi-polar."

The Mixed Tape by Jack's Mannequin
"Where are you now?
As I'm swimming through the stereo
I'm writing you a symphony of sound
Where are you now?
As I rearrange the songs again
This mix could burn a hole in anyone
But it was you I was thinking of."

Slide by Goo Goo Dolls
"And I'll do anything you ever
Dreamed to be complete
Little pieces of the nothing that fall
Baby put your arms around me
What you feel is what you are
And what you are is beautiful
Baby do you wanna get married
Or run away ."

Only Hope by Switchfoot
"So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
and pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now you're my only hope."

Run by Snow Patrol
"Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear."

Closer

Come a little closer,
let me hear your softest,
almost inaudible whisper.
Come closer.
So close that I'd be able to hear
your thoughts.

Probably?

Why would you give away a keeper?
Could be you're just so scared to lose.
Probably.
Yeah, most probably.

Slide

Why don't you slide?
Yeah, we're gonna let it..

Slide.

It's 1:50 am.

Currently seeing rainbows
and everything is floating.
Kick in the air
and it feels so light.
Jump. Oh no,
don't jump.
And then I stop.
And then I think.
What have I gotten myself into?
Again.
What have I been doing lately?
Does it really matter?
Does it always have to make sense?
This one doesn't.
For sure, it doesn't.
But there are rainbows,
sometimes, even butterflies.
Going, going, gone.
Off to dreaming.
It doesn't always have to make sense.

I'm Blank

Downright dumbfounded.
Others can really be unbelievably,
inconceivably and utterly...
UGH.
Beyond words.
Words cannot even explain.
It's that...
WAH.

This is my personal space.
My refuge. Writing was, is and will always be my refuge.

If you don't like what you see,
Uhm..
Then just don't look?
Please?
Thank you.

And oh, Merry Christmas.

Now What

I simply cannot discern
who to love,
and who to burn.

Silence

Shut the windows,
shut the doors.
Close your eyes,
cover your ears,
forget the madness.
I'm here.
All yours.

In my silence, I'm all yours.

Dilemma

I'm torn between this life I lead
and where I know I'm supposed to stand.

Good in Everyone

Every individual, regardless of who and what they are
and how they choose to project themselves,
will always have something good in them.

It just varies in the way it is manifested and presented to the world.

Bottom line, there is a good side to every human being
--or to every human being in our lives for that matter.

Just take time to find it, see it and appreciate it.

To Whom It May Concern:

Some random questions popped inside my head.
Ask yourself these questions,
then try to find answers inside of you.

--What good stuff have you done lately?
--Where are you going?
--We all wear masks, what does your mask cover?

*Okay, Fight.

I am not going to deny anything.

I am not going to contradict the stuff that you claim
about us being the greatest comfort there is to each other,
being able to get that "beach trip" vibe that we want so we could get away
from the world for a bit at the convenience of the couch or the garage,
or because we are two completely different individuals who share
the same perspectives, different experiences and whatnot

--simply because it is the same for me.

What I meant by waiting is that you give everything time.
Time for things to settle on it's own..
I can't answer your question, "What should I do?", as much as I would want to.

But have you tried asking the question, "Should I do anything right now?"?
Maybe you should not do anything first,
and just let things be for a little while.

See how things will turn out.

And however things turn out,
I'll hang around --as I've said for the nth time.

*Sit Still

Stand with an apple in your head.

For now, this is what you should do.

This person --she matters more now. Her feelings, her welfare, everything.

These are all parts of who you are now --of what you do, say or think as a being.

Not that they were not a part of you before, but they are now, in a deeper more concrete way.

Wait for the dust to settle. Wait for things to clear themselves out for a bit.

When the path is a little clearer, that is when you will start walking to whatever direction
--with a clearer, more visible path.

What exactly will you have to fight for or fight against? Sit still.

Just try to sit still.

*I Do Understand

I know what you mean.
I get it --entirely.

It may seem.. This may seem out of line --well, way out of line.
But I'm here.
And I'll guide you the best way I know how.
I will always be here.
We'll keep things in place.

Now, reality check.
Ugh, I hate doing this, but it's kind of necessary.
But this is what we'll do..

We'll keep up with reality,
with it's painful, restricting and oftentimes,
downright depressing implications.

We will go through this.
With this connection,
this understanding.

I will hang around for you, okay?

I don't walk out of people's lives, Buddy.
That's just not my thing.

Free Your Mind

Emancipate yourself from mental slavery;
none but ourselves can free our minds.

All hail Bob Marley.

Change

So... Okay.
Cliche: Things change and so do people too.

Everyday, everything and everyone changes --one way or another.
Actually, change does not need a day for it to happen.
It only needs a snap, a blink of an eye,
a short breath --a moment.

Although if I may --and of course I will,
I will contradict the stuff written above for a bit.

You see, I have changed.
A lot since whenever.

But there are things in me,
parts of me, pieces of me
--that will always remain the same.

There are marks on me.
Left by the people who held and touched me --figuratively and literally.
And these marks will be here.
I will carry them with me.

As I go through change,
some things in me will always stay the same.

So yeah, things change and so do people too.

But there are just some things that can never be
removed, replaced or displaced
--no matter how drastic the changes might be.

Wishful Thinking

Maybe..
Just maybe..
I can get you alone again one time.

Why don't we just talk about it
somewhere only we now.

This could be the end of everything;
so why don't we go..
Somewhere only we know..

A Symphony

I can write a symphony.
Each note written with my
sincerest thoughts and feelings.

My words.
They are all I have.

And this symphony,
I write for you.
Who is "you" now?
You think it's her?
Though sometimes,
I know you want to think that it's for you.
So who do you think it's for?
I don't know either.

I'm writing a symphony.
In my mind,
I will play it.
And I would not know who it is playing for each time it does.

I know though who my heart will always beat for.
Always and always.

Castles

I have watched my castles fall;
they were made of dust after all.

You were made of dust after all.
Your words and promises
--they're all dust after all.

Just Now

I've talked about lines being crossed.
And just now, I realized,
I've crossed so many lines already.
And now, at this very moment,
I am crossing another.
Gawd, another one.

Random Thought, 8.39am.

I'd trade my soul for peace and clarity.

Boyd, Sept. 1999

I think perhaps love thrives on unlikely circumstance and chance:
Life thrives on those principles and is life not love?
And love not life?

Boyd, Sept. 1999

Schooled

I live, I learn.
I love, I learn.
I cry, I learn.
I laugh, I learn.
I grieve, I learn.
I fight, I learn.
I breathe, I learn.
I trust, I learn.
I feel, I learn.

Life schooled me.
I've yet to learn more but I was sure schooled well enough by life itself.

1st, the 2nd Time Around

So here we are.
We'll do our first the second time around.
Trust me,
I'll make it worth it :)

Put all the anxiety aside,
it's just me.
Free falling is not a problem when I'm the one catching.

Closing Time

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end

;)