The Story: An Overview

I have been in a relationship. Or relationships? Six years with my boyfriend. Now ex-boyfriend. And eight years and counting with my best friend. Girl best friend. My whole life, these were the two relationships that have molded me. I think.

I met her in school. Grade 6. We were classmates. I knew she hated me back then because the guy of her dreams was rumored to be crushing on me. But no worries best friend, I was scared of him anyway. We talked and we talked and we talked. Then there, best friends we became. We went on doing what best friends do.

I met him through a friend. My best friend's then boyfriend's then best friend. He was that new guy who came in during our Grade 6 year and immediately played for the basketball team.

During our first year in high school, he came up to me. We happened. It was an easy three years when my life evolved around him and my best friend and our small circle of friends.

My best friend and I, we were still best friends. But bizarre things were starting to happen. And they did not stop. Things between me and my best friend went haywire. Somehow though, we remained as the usual best friends outside but between the two of us, we were not.

Me and him, we're still together and I was a good girlfriend to him. Watched his games, gave him gifts, supported him, listened and talked to him, I loved and cared for him the best way I knew how.

Third year. Things became crazy. Super crazy. I became close to a different group of people. I had fun. It was not all clean but who cares, things were great. I had "adventures". My new friends, we called it that. All the little rebellions left and right. Our talks about how messed up things are around us and how we wanted to start to do things differently. And we did. I became someone I never knew I could become.

Vices. Vices. Vices.

He stayed with me through everything. I messed up and he cleaned myself up for me. I fell down and he picked me up, got himself dirty dusting me. I would do the craziest, most inconsiderate of things and he would be there to tell me to stop. I never listened. He was always patient with me. Always. There were times that I would push him away but he would come back each and every single time that I would fall because of the crazy things that I do.

My best friend and I started to have issues. I guess it was because of the understanding that we had between us. Our jealousy and greed ate us both alive. But somehow, we are able to rise above all of those and to this day, remain as what we are.

I hurt her. Too many times. But at that time, I could not care less. But she never left me entirely.

I hurt him. Too many times. But at that time, I could not care less. But he never left me entirely.

The fall I had that caused the loudest and the most painful thud was when we were about to finish high school. A series of stupid, unthinkable, inconceivable and illogical mistakes. I almost got kicked out of school. I pushed him away to be able to do my incredibly stupid deeds and when it was time to clean up the mess, he was there again.

At that time, he was everything. I was so afraid of everything else. I did not want to even stand up from the couch inside our house where we always hangout doing whatever: watching DVDs, playing with the PS2, watching TV, eating or even just talking.

I was able to survive that horrible, horrible phase of my life though. Got into college and steadied.

I spent my first year of college trying to be in my best behavior. Somehow, trying to be who I am not. Exaggeratedly behaved. Watched movies with my block mates, had dinners together, spent wholesome time cracking jokes and those things. It was all good until I kind of got tired already. I got back to my vices but all in moderation. I know now.

I broke it off with him.

I am still in it with her.