A Big Errant Contradiction

I am one big, walking errant contradiction.

There is confidence. There are doubts and fears.
There is boasting and feeling proud. There is feeling nothing and small.
There is feeling smart, knowing it all. There is feeling dumb.
There is contentment. There is wanting more.
There is happiness. There is grief and loneliness.
There is apathy. There is sympathy.
There is pride. There is too much giving of one's self.
There is moving on. There is going back.
There is trusting. There is holding back.
There is kindness. There is meanness.
There is hardworking. There is sloth.
There is faithful. There is turning away.
There is willingness. There is hesitation.
There is hope. There is giving up.
There is fine. There is messed up.
There is whole. There is incomplete.