If...

If you are going to fall in love with me, it's only fair that you know who and what you are falling in love with.

You are falling in love with my insecurities, and my obsession with trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me- or if anyone even thinks anything of me at all. You are falling in love with my inmaturity, with my constant need to feel loved and appreciated, my overactive tear ducts, my internet obsession, my tendency to be clingy. You are falling in love with my troubled past, and my hopes and dreams, and how I am a hopeless romantic at heart. If you fall in love with me, you fall in love with my self-hate and my imperfections and my perception that nobody could ever love me.

But, you are also falling in love with the way my eyes smile whenever I'm with you, the way I will text you in the morning even if we spent the whole night and even slept together just to say that I hope you have a great day. You are falling in love with how I would do anything and everything to make you smile and laugh. You are falling in love with the occasionally humorous or thought-provoking things that I say, and the way I blush when people ask me about you.

But above all, the most important thing is that you are falling in love with me despite my thinking that it is impossible.

❤️

..

Thinks aren't always how they seem. Especially at home. I think this is the first time I'm ever admitting that things aren't how I'd ideally want them to be. But just at home. Everything else is fine.

This is it.

And you know it's not just one of those things again. This is actually it. 

I look forward to the lunch, dinner and movie dates, the night outs and planned or spontaneous trips to wherever. The parties and late night til sunrise get togethers. The big, IG-post-worthy moments.

But more than anything, I look forward to the everyday stuff- the waking up, going to work, getting stuck in traffic, having a bad day, client meetings, falling in line, doing errands and eating left over food at home stuff. It's these day to day things that other people don't see. It's these things that will make up most of our lives. And I look forward to them, with you. What we have allows us to stay in touch with reality and finding joy in the simplest of things while still staying in "tralala" as we call it.

I thought I'd never believe in this again. I guess I was wrong.

❤️

❤️

She said yes! ❤️

Tadhana

Sa hindi inaaasahang

Pagtatagpo ng mga mundo

May minsan lang nagdugtong,

Damang dama na ang ugong nito.

Di pa ba sapat ang sakit at lahat

Na hinding hindi ko ipaparanas sayo

Ibinubunyag ka ng iyong mata

Sumisigaw ng pag-sinta.

Bakit di papatulan

Ang pagsuyong nagkulang

Tayong umaasang

Hilaga't kanluran

Ikaw ang hantungan

At bilang kanlungan mo

Ako ang sasagip sayo.

Saan nga ba patungo,

Nakayakap at nahihiwagaan na

Ang bagyo ng tadhana ay

Dinadala ako sa init ng bisig mo

Bakit di pa sabihin 

Ang hindi mo maamin

Ipauubaya na lang ba 'to sa hangin

Wag mong ikatakot

Ang bulong ng damdamin mo

Naririto ako't nakikinig sayo

..

I told myself before that when I can tell myself that I'm okay to be alone, then that's the time I'm ready to commit. I think I can tell myself now that I'm okay to be alone. Not super sure yet. But I think I'm okay :D

:)

Ang sarap mabuhay :)

:D

And just like that, you made my day :)

❤️

I think I found her ❤️ 

I know I said I'll wait til I'm ready. And I will. I'll take things slow. 

Oh man. I found her ❤️

...

I've got some serious realizations ha. I think I need to be alone. Like alone alone.  Like as in no one but friends and family level. Then when I can honestly tell myself that "hey, I can live like this, with myself" then that's the time that I'm ready. Ready to commit entirely and fully.

Well this is as of this moment that I am writing this. So this can change. But yeah, I think right now this is my fight plan :)

Oh yeeees :D

Gets

Okay, now I understand why the things that happened had to happen. 

I don't think I understand everything 100% but I think I got a good chunk of it.

I'm being taught a lot of awesome lessons. I'll explain it more later on, when I am able to compose my forever unkempt mind.

As for now, no regrets, as in 0. I'll just keep moving forward. No looking back :)

Hey You

Thank you that you walked into my life. 

Thank you that there is someone I could sort of look up to and want to be with all rolled up into one.

Thank you that even if you don't have any idea that you are, you are teaching me to be patient. You are teaching me the value of waiting for the right time.

Thank you.

Echo

There's something about the look in your eyes, something I noticed when the light was just right. It reminded me twice that I was alive and it reminded me that you're so worth the fight.

--

Okay. No rush. Something that you really really want to get and to keep forever does not need to be rushed. It will all come together. Step back, take a breath. It's all going to be alright.

Jacquiline..

Salamat.

Workwork

Officially, work started again today. It was a long, busy day.

Thank You for the opportunities and the potential to learn and grow in what I do.

I was feeling a bit lost today but still, thank You for today. 

First for 2014

The first 5 days of the new year has been awesome-

Had family time

Tipple and Slaw opening

Spent time with friends

Closed a deal

And this is just the beginning. There are still 360 days left to work hard, close deals and to make new memories with the people I love :)

Thank You Lord for everything!

2013 is about to end

It's the time of the year again.  The time to look back at the good and bad stuff.

Well.. Forget it, I'm not looking back.  I'm thankful for the things that happened and did not happen. I'm sorry if I hurt anyone along the way.

From where I'm standing now, I'm looking forward.

More highs, more getting lost and finding myself again. Rock bottoms, highest highs. Good stuff, bad stuff. It doesn't matter. I'll live my life with the people I love. I will work hard, even harder as I have in the past. I will be there for my friends and my family. I will rock at life. I will rock at living my life.

Thank you for the lessons, 2013!

Right Now

Drove to Fuego this morning with the family- Tita Mila, Tito Boy, Ate Tin, Ate Pat, 8s, Kuya Dino, Kuy, Jom, Dion, Andy, Drew, Tammy & Steph. We'll be staying here til Sunday.

Thank You Lord for this time away from Manila, this time to just be together as a family. 

Thank You for providing us with the resources to go on this simple trip and enjoy each other's company.

I can never thank You enough Lord :)

Til the next one :)

:)

I'm just super happy right now.

Thank You Lord for this.

Thank You for allowing for things to fall into place like this.

My work, my family, my friends and everything else :)

I cannot thank You enough Lord :)